Living without ‘Emotion’
Emotion here refers to strong feelings. Since n years ago, i live without emotion. May be nobody will believe there is such a person in this world. Nevertheless, i think i’m such a person.
i didn’t cry since.. secondary school, may be. i do not have great joyfulness since ‘that’ time (i can’t really remember since when). It’s as though there is no single thing in this world that could bring great happiness/sadness to me. What had happen to me? Take for example, even on the announcement day of the stpm result, i do not feel a single emotion from inside of me. Take for another example, on my form 5 graduation day, everybody around me is full of emotion (happiness + crying), but i rather do not feel it. WHY?
May be i always take things for granted. Everything that happened around me seems to happen so naturally that i couldn’t feel it. Solitude, alone, always match me. They seem to happen on me so often..
"Emotionless". See it another way round, it’s emptiness of soul and blank. What am i trying to say here? i myself also do not understand. i do know why i have to write this blog, just to express the very little emotion that is left inside of me? That’s why i’ve said understand oneself is so difficult.
Still not finish yet.. (However, i’ve decided to stop here and post it first until.. till i know how to finish it, haha..)
November 26th, 2006 at 11:10 am
i think u lost the passion twd life,tat’s y u din feel a thing..when sum1 is passionate abt sumthin,they’ll feel all sorts of emotions..
mayb u decide to hide ur feelings deep inside,subconsiously hoping no one can see tru u…
in a way,i sorta understand how u feel…being transparent isn’t all good,but at d same time,itz unhealthy to hide all ur emotions..
ehheh..look at me,crappin abt all these stuff..mayb i shld take up psychology,hehehee
November 28th, 2006 at 6:19 pm
erm…. i think why u feel living without emotion is because u never open ur heart to c this word. u never open ur heart to feel or even contact with this world. sometime this is good also at least we might not be hurt by people. but is not healthy if u keep on like this. i think u should face to ur real feeling. try to open ur heart to feel this world which full with happiness sadness and other. when u open ur heart u might feel different.
trust me nobody is born without emotion the differ is juz only whether u open ur heart a not….
November 28th, 2006 at 6:21 pm
Hmm, that feels a bit like me..^^…’cept that i have my bouts of ‘emotionless’ and ‘emotion’ states…^^..at one moment, i can be cold as you like..at the other moment..i might be crying just over a small matter in a movie..(no, i don’t believe you all have seen me done so, for those who were with me in form six)…being an observer in life isn’t that bad, just remember when the time comes for you to do something, you’ll have to plunge into the messes created by life…^^
November 30th, 2006 at 7:05 am
sounds familiar… haha
mayb I understand that, coz I face the same. Yes, lost passion. For me, it just like I hv known what surprise it is before a surprise come to me, as a result… no surprise when surprise come. Same case, when I know i’m going to sad/happy, so finally I didn’t sad/happy.
Heh, likai, now I understand u more, since we r same, so just let us fight for better, that’s y I always need passion friends, as well as they can bring me become passionate as well.